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Animated ponies make wonderful lovers;
They want to have sex with you (and others).

Entertaining young girls was a simple facade/Her primary function is to make you hard.



Art by *quila111

Want more satire about bronies?

Cease and Desist, Online Bronies!"Cease and Desist, Online Bronies!"

The two words that bronies fear above all,
Making them a target for hunting's sake.
One after another they drop and fall,
Leaving a trail of brony-tears in their wake.

Then two bronies eager to quote the law,
(Threatening dreams of courthouses and bench)
Start their internet search and declare war,
Quoting vacuous facts from where and whence.

The first, with an authoritative eye,
Spreads leg to his foe by building his wall;
Mantles word from an informed alibi;
Clears throat and offers the following drawl:

"Hasbro, play the fair hand;
A year and a half has gone up in smoke!
I wasn't making a p
An Enterprise: The Brony Thanks-To-You ProjectA Short Enterprise: The Brony Thanks-To-You Project; Or, The Pocket-Book Misgivings of an Industrious Assembly.

From the perspective of the Right Honourable Diffuser of Situations Grave.



Pleasing as it is to the court of fine peers, I bid good passing that eyes are directed away from licentious misgivings of communication to a universal act of decency. Forwarding this matter, to the public entity of best intentions, I relay the pending program of diffusion; that I shall, with all good and fair-chosen morals, launch a campaign of acceptance, and it shall be called the Brony Thanks-To-You Project, which will, accordingly, boast produc
There's a Hole in my Lyra (Down Below)"Written from the Venerable Earl... to the concerned party,

It has come to my attention that with grave discourse many have seemingly adopted a negative stance towards the recent pony plush-toy range with the custom-cut vagina. I contend that such a plush has every right to exist and that those negatively disposed towards it are failing to see the multitudinous benefits to its existence. Firstly, and with the greatest of importance, may I add, I strongly argue that this plush-toy is no less acceptable than any other erotic image or work of fiction designed with the primary objective of helping a brony to reach a satisfying climax. In fact, I
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:icondarkvikingmistress:
DarkVikingMistress Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
:XD: Haha I'm actually neutral on clopping, but this was hilarious
Reply
:iconzancrispy:
Zancrispy Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Where am I 
Reply
:iconthelapphund:
TheLappHund Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2013
What the....
Reply
:iconpsycho-lantern:
Psycho-Lantern Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2013
hahahahahaha! it's funny kuz some people think that way. MLP FIM characters are too damn cute for any sexuality theme, specially pinkie pie, argh too cute!
Reply
:iconlatecustomer:
LateCustomer Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013   Digital Artist
XD
I'm sorry I didn't see these earlier, they're great!

I would love to know how many people didn't read the description and took you seriously :D (And in full honesty, I MIGHT have if I didn't know you ;) )
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2013
Haha! Thanks, buddy! I occasionally become radicalized by 'events' in the fandom. Usually when something silly happens, I write some sort of satire about it. Quite often people do take them seriously - before editing in a disclaimer explaining it was a joke, lots of people got offended by my 'There's a Hole in my Lyra' deviation. I'm glad that you know better.
Reply
:iconstanku:
Stanku Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2012
By claiming that the ponies, Twilight Sparkle in this case, want to have sex with a person reading this piece of art, are you refering to the will imposed to them by their creators, by Lauren Faust and her crew, or to the will a brony imagines in them to make them more vivid and by that more intriguing and tempting, more appealing to the libido of the brony, to try and hide the fact that one is only aroused by thoughts created in ones own mind, that is to say, to hide the fact that one is aroused by oneself in an ultimate egoistic turn of events - is this what you mean or is your goal something more subtle? I'm not trolling here, just curious.
Reply
:iconnuggetporn:
nuggetporn Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
what the fuck...this is not okay. one of the reasons i hate bronies..
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
Read the description.
Reply
:iconbronybeforepony:
BronyBeforePony Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
obviously all most read was the first line and not the second
Reply
:iconbiblozgirlz:
BiblozGirlz Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
THIZ IS GARKLSDNFKSADLHFKSDHFKSADFHKSADHFKDHFKHDSKDFNDKFJDKDCJVNSDKLRTHRKSDHCNVKSDHFDKSJVKSHFKDSHKSHFJDHFCXDCHJDKHFK! OK

NEDZ BILBOZ
Reply
:icongeojoey99:
geojoey99 Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng. OMG YES!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconwolfifi:
wolfifi Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:iconreactionzoomplz:




WHAT DID I READ?
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
A load of nonsense.
Reply
:iconthe-syreth-clan:
The-Syreth-Clan Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I totally expected Twilight repeating "please please please". :XD:
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
Why?
Reply
:iconthe-syreth-clan:
The-Syreth-Clan Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't know. :rofl:
That was my first thought after reading the title.
Reply
:iconlookman3733:
lookman3733 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012
She whont to use it as a learning experience possibly
Reply
:iconsilenthilldan:
silenthilldan Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
You sir, I want to blow you for making this beautiful piece of literature. :icontrollpeterparkerplz:
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
Hrnn!!
Reply
:iconmetta117:
metta117 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
no just no!
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
NO DADDY NO
Reply
:iconmetta117:
metta117 Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
no :iconnofaceplz:
Reply
:iconcolinmlp:
ColinMLP Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I agree.
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
You woullddd
Reply
:iconchibilombax:
chibilombax Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
People really fail at reading descriptions xD
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
There's your 'offend people with two lines'. Stop making me do bad things.
Reply
:iconchibilombax:
chibilombax Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
You loves it and you knows it <3
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
I'd argue back, but you know me so well.
Reply
:icondoctordapples:
doctordapples Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
Tara Strong is so hawwwwt
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
NO NOT TARA JUST PONI
Reply
:icondoctordapples:
doctordapples Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
fair enough. Tara would be way hotter with hooves.
Reply
:iconwonder-woof:
Wonder-Woof Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student Filmographer
Wat
Reply
:iconpap64:
pap64 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
Because who needs human females that are actually compatible with us when you can have rainbow ponies that aim to please in EVERY, MANNER, POSSIBLE. ;)
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
They were made to be glazed like a doughnut with the sperm of youth.
Reply
:icongeojoey99:
geojoey99 Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
did NOT want to know
Reply
:iconriver-birch:
River-Birch Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
So amazing.
Reply
:iconmylittlebrony:
MyLittleBrony Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
omg i am clop an das offensive
Reply
:iconjuria316:
Juria316 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
:rofl:
Reply
:iconmortalshinobi:
mortalshinobi Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
haha. lols. nice face for twi here.
Reply
:iconfirefanatic:
firefanatic Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I liked it better when they were longer...

Nah. Doesn't matter.
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
I was challenged after offending people with the last one (three lines) to achieve the same outcome in two.

Let's see what happens here.
Reply
:icon101pegasister101:
101Pegasister101 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
>.<
Reply
:iconetramors:
etramors Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
YOU HORRIBLE, VILE PIG!
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
:iconcudpugmagicplz:
Reply
:iconhandofcreation0:
HandofCreation0 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Holy shit you have a custom plz icon for yourself?
Reply
:iconcuddlepug:
Cuddlepug Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
Yeah! Whoever made it is hilarious.
Reply
:iconfirefanatic:
firefanatic Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
^ Not sure if joking...

...or actually believed it.
Reply
:iconetramors:
etramors Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
Obviously kidding
Reply
:icondrowvenmechanism:
DrowvenMechanism Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
as nicely drawn as this is. I can't stand it when people do it
Reply
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December 27, 2012
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